Om śāntiḥ śāntiḥ śāntiḥ

I didn't plan on this to happen. It just did.This winter has been particularly hard for my body. No one seems to know why or what is causing it, well, except from my other 99 problems. I was having so much trouble with my back and my neck, I was in constant pain and all I wanted to do was throw up and sleep. Painkillers just took the edge off, heating bottles worked while the water was still hot. I was desperate, so I started stretching. Flat on the floor, just trying to get some relief from the pain. Pressure balls, my fists, anything that could help - I was trying it.

At first, I started using my wife's foam roller to try and crush knots in my upper back and neck. It seemed to work, but only while I was doing it. As soon as I stopped, the pain returned. I experimented with different poses and ended up in what I now know is called a plough in the yogi-world. It was the most comfortable I had been in months. So, I just started hanging out in the plough position, not knowing why it worked and not caring. It was working. It was instant pain relief, and I just wanted to stay like that forever. That's about two months ago.

Now, I'm using my body for good every day. I've slowly been changing my daily routines, sneaking in mindful moments and meditative breaks throughout the day. Working on my breath and stretching muscles that's been hibernating for years. It's been hard, and it will still be hard - but I've decided it's worth it. Short term and long term.

I have fallen in love. I never thought it would happen to me again, especially since I'm still in love and married to the love of my life. Ida is totally fine with it, btw - we have a very open relationship like that. I'm dating Yoga, and it's getting serious, fast. We've only just met, like two months ago, but I can already tell we're soul mates.

I can't change my history, but I can learn from it. I accept my past and I embrace my present. Maybe I'll share this journey with you, maybe I wont, but for the first time in years I'm inspired to write something. And I have what I can only assume is that thing everyone calls "hope". Now that's something!



  1. Good for you, Barb! Yoga does wonders for the body, mind and soul :) I have a 6 months old daughter and I need to get back into my yoga routine, as our phisycal routines become more exhausting, but it's been hard to find the time lately. Keep up the good work! Namaste!

    1. Thank you very much. I have found that it calms me in ways I didn't know was possible. It's quite liberating.

      Hope you get back to your routine soon ♥️ and congrats on creating a new life! Girls rock!

  2. I totally feel your pain! I was in a car accident last year and tore my shoulder muscles and bulged my discs in my neck/spine. I was in pain for 6 months. Ugh - with constant physical therapy I got better. I started working out again in August. Not with Yoga but weight training and cardio- my neck and shoulders feel sooo much better. I still have days or time periods where they hurt and I have to take it easy.
    Glad to hear that your feeling better and that Yoga is working for you! :)

    1. Thank you very much, Heidi!

      I'm sorry to hear about you accident, but very glad to hear that you're recovering. There is no miracle cure for muscle and joint pain, but at least we both have found ways to deal with our pain. One step at a time <3

  3. Anonymous12:24 AM

    I feel you. I have just the same with yoga. It gives me freedom.


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